Episode 221 – Serving Children and Families in Teton County with Sarah Cavallaro

You are tuned into the Jackson hole, connection, sharing, fascinating stories of people connected to Jackson Hole.

I am truly grateful for each of you for tuning in today and support for this podcast comes from:

I so much enjoy reading so I can share the thoughts of others with you and my wife, who so enjoys listening to me share quotes and today's quote.

Is the worst thing you can do for those you love, is the things they could do and should do for themselves.

And that comes from Abraham Lincoln.

I think we all know who he is, and you are listening to episode number 221, and my guest today is the courageous and funny Sarah Cavallero.

Sarah is the Executive Director of Teton Youth and Family Services.

Sarah's a mom, a wife, an advocate for kids and families here in Teton County and throughout the state of Wyoming.

Sarah's story is one you will want to listen to and certainly share with others.

Sarah is inspiring with her bravery for herself and her family, and she also shares with us how she works tirelessly for the families here in our community.

Sarah will share her journey of arriving here in Jackson battling cancer.

With two young kids in the household and why finding the funny in life is so important.

Sarah, thank you for joining me here today at the Jackson Hole Connection.

It's great to have you here today.

Yeah, thanks for having me.

You are welcome.

Uh, it's a snowy morning.

You are commuting around town in your car.

we will, jump right into the conversation because you have some appointments to take care of as well.

Okay.

you have a big role that you, fill in this c.

Let's start off Sarah, by you sharing where did you grow up?

Where were you born and raised, and how did you land out here in Jackson Hole, Wyoming?

I grew up in upstate New York, in this little town called Norwich.

it was more cows and people.

It was a four H kid.

my dad owned a feed business and so we got to be part of having a family business and all of.

Entails.

and I went to college in Prescott, Arizona.

I went on an Outward Bound trip when I was 16 for the summer and canoe the west branch of the Penobscot River in Maine and kind of fell in love with.

Wilderness and I was going for a tough time and as every 16 year old usually does.

And it really helped me find a place that I felt good and happy and safe.

And so I went to college to study to do that, and I got my undergrad in wilderness therapy and when I left college, I did a bunch of research.

there's this group called the Association of Adventure Education and they had a newsletter that would come out monthly and post jobs and highlight programs, and Red Top Meadows was one of the top ranked wilderness programs in the country.

And I was looking at different wilderness programs to go try my degree out in, and Red Top came up as one of the options and I was like, oh, Jackson Hole.

That sounds like a good idea.

I was in Arizona and I Didn't miss the grayness, but I missed the winters and the seasons and so I moved to Jackson and before I moved to Jackson, I applied to Sea Barbie and Red Top Metals and Red Top was not hiring cause Had no staff turnover and CRV hired me to work and, that's how I got to Jackson.

And so I worked at CRV for about two and a half years.

And then from there took a little hiatus to Hawaii for about a year, and then came back and then worked at laptop.

So what year was that that you first moved out?

1999.

Hey, where's we're

the same class?

It feels like it wasn't that long ago, but it really is.

. Stephan Abrams: It's like 23 years ago.

Sarah

When in 99 did you move out here?

I was June of 99.

Oh,

I was August.

And I lived in my truck for four months moving around from like Shadow Mountain to the rec center parking lot to Mosquito Creek, you know, the whole dance.

And I remember that was a really cool time cause everything I owned fit in my truck and including living in my truck with me and my dog.

And it was like so easy and simple and I can't imagine putting all of my belongings in a truck right now.

. Stephan Abrams: Well, as we age in life and acquire spouses and kids, we get more things that come along with that.

It's not our, it's not our fault.

It's all the spouses and the kids.

It's

definitely not

my fault,

And so now you are connected to Red Top Meadows.

You don.

For them directly, but, share with us what you are, are now

doing.

So sometimes I work for them directly.

Okay.

I am the executive director of Teton Youth and Family Services and there are times where I need to do childcare to help with staff shortages, so I get to be with the kids on occasion.

I was actually just thinking about how next summer I'd like to go and do part of the wilderness trips with the kids, cuz it, I miss that part of.

actually doing, taking them out on the trips.

But I run Teton Youth and Family Services.

I took over from Bruce Berkland almost exactly four years ago.

He retired after 40 years, and I got chosen by the board to carry the torch.

it's been an interesting but mostly fun, fun journey.

Yeah, it's definitely where my heart lies.

I feel really, really, really lucky to have such fulfilling work.

and, you know, it's just a lot of problem solving and figuring out how to take the parts and pieces and fit 'em together to make the, the services available to kids.

Mm-hmm.

. Now I'm, I wanna learn more about Teton Youth and Family Services, but I also would like for you to share before we get into that, A pretty major life-changing event that you went through.

Yep.

could you share that with us?

Sure.

My mom got diagnosed with breast cancer and.

Which was kind of out of nowhere.

she, I went home to visit her.

She's in upstate New York still, and went home to visit her.

And sh I was like, I should probably have a mammogram.

I was 43 years old but that's not indicated typically for my age.

And so I came back to Jackson.

I went and visited her mid February and came back to Jackson and, on.

Birthday I, I was like, oh, I'm gonna go have a mammogram every year on my birthday.

So I remember.

And so I went in on February 28th to go have my mammogram, and a week later I found out I had early stage breast cancer.

Which was fairly shocking because it was, I mean, I think it's fairly shocking anytime you find that out, but I was not in my sphere of things that could happen.

what happened next was a bunch of testing and, it was very, very, it was like the end of a ballpoint pen, the size of it, and very deep, like almost near my chest wall.

And so, It was talked about, you know, what are the options?

And I decided to go with a double mastectomy.

And I have two kids and I felt like I was 43 and really young, and I didn't wanna be worrying about this for the rest of my life.

Even though you do kind of worry about it for the rest of your life.

. Mm-hmm.

so I had the double mastectomy at the end of April and then they did some genetic testing on the tumors, which is if anyone's gone through cancer treatment, you go down this rabbit hole of crazy and kind of find all these different paths.

But they have an incredible amount of research on, you know, you're this age.

Get this situation.

This is what's supposed to happen next.

And so they did the genetic testing and what was supposed to happen next is that I was supposed to have chemo and I thought it was gonna be just get a mastectomy and I can move on with my life cuz it was kind of preventative.

Well, And then I got to have chemo for four months and it was the kind of chemo that's like the nuclear bomb chemo, where they, they basically said, we're gonna try and kill everything in your body four times and then you should probably be good . So, I did that.

it was a very strange, surreal experience.

I had a four-year-old and a seven-year-old at the time, and you know, I lost my hair in like a week and a half after the first treatment.

And my son was like, you're not my mom.

I don't wanna touch you.

You know, like he was really scared and it was just one of those times where it was like, wow, this is like a really crazy change of, you know, where my perspective and priorities are.

So, time went on, I had reconstruction that November and then they said, you should be good to go now.

And so I took this pill that was supposed to block estrogen cause this, tumor was est, like eating estrogen essentially, and feeding on it.

And so they wanted to block the estrogen and.

So we did that and I'd go back every six months and get checked in.

And a year ago in January, the first week of January, I went in because I had found this like weird lump and I was like, this can't be anything bad because I had a double mastectomy and I found this lump.

But I thought it, I was like, it's probably scar tissue.

It's probably you.

Trying to not go off the cliff.

luckily Carrie Carr is, an oncology nurse at St.

John's and she's also a friend of mine and I was able to text her and she was like, come in tomorrow, . And so I came in the next day and then I went, it was almost like the exact same.

Process happened again is I got a mammogram.

Then suddenly I had to go get a MRI and a biopsy, and I, it, I just freaked out.

turns out I had cancer again.

It was in the same spot.

They think that they didn't because the first time.

The cancer is so close to my chest wall.

They thought they had clean margins, but perhaps they didn't.

Anyway, I had to go back to Huntsman.

I had surgery again February of LA of this past year, and then, they wanted me to do radiation, so I went, my sister lives in Ogden, so I went and moved down to Ogden with my sister for a month, and then had, you know, a month of radiation and.

Every single day, which was weird.

And then I came home and I had decided to have a hysterectomy as well because the estrogen piece of the puzzle and all of this is a big factor of it coming back and I just was ready to not do this again.

Mm-hmm.

, um, So I had that in April, and then by mid-June I was back on my feet and here I am.

I'm cancer free, but I think the second time around I've kind of become a little bit more aware of.

It's not gone.

You know, like it's, you can never say forever.

And I gotta just live in the moment and live in the gray.

Cause it could come back next week.

And isn't it great that we have so much research on breast cancer and it's like the most research treatable form of cancer?

So I'm, I got, as I've heard, I got a good form of cancer . Hmm.

So brave

Sarah.

Well, you know, stuff.

People say that, but you just show up.

It's not brave.

Like I, I've said, well, what was I gonna do?

Lay down and die?

Mm-hmm.

, that's not really my style of, you know, you just, it's, it was very, very scary every day.

And, but I will say, The Huntsman Center gave me incredible amount of hope and confidence that I was gonna be okay.

So having that level of care, I feel very, very lucky.

I went to Huntsman the first time and I , I remember saying like, did someone pay them off?

Or know that I was coming down here and like give someone a tip or extra money to be super nice to me and like arrange all the things.

It was just an incredible medical experience where I showed up for the first appointment and they had already scheduled five more appointments during that day to do biopsies and MRIs and all the things.

So they had like they knew the program and had it all scheduled and I didn't have to come back eight times and it was really, I feel very fortunate that we had.

That kind of healthcare coverage to be able to go through this.

Cuz they made it, I had the, the head of oncology for Huntsman call me eight o'clock at night one night and I was like, that's above and beyond any kind of, you know, regular service.

They're phenomenal, phenomenal facility there.

I have my Wyoming dad, he.

Pancreatic cancer and was down there and the treatment that he received and they come up here.

yeah, that doctor,

yeah, I got to have chemo here.

Like that was huge.

I didn't have to leave, like radiation was hard to leave the kids for a month, but I had to be down there and it, it's amazing that we, I can do my checkups here and not have to keep going to Salt Lake.

Well.

I said, you're brave and you're, you said, well, what else am I gonna do?

I mean, you're brave, you're a fighter.

You, you were brave to fight and say, I'm not gonna let lie down.

you didn't not allow it to overcome you.

And,

I'm also a really stubborn human, so of it,

but you sharing this as well can help other people realize, how important it is to receive that testing.

The screening.

Oh, yeah.

You know, I assume it was just a whim for you to

say Totally.

And it was an accident that they found it, what they were looking for the first time when they were doing the biopsy was not what they found Like what they were biopsying right next to it was the cancer.

So they were like, oh, I think we'll just biopsied this too.

And it was like, thank God, and they're just the talent that happened here, the talent that happened at Huntsman.

I feel very, very, very lucky that I was where I, where I was living, where I was to be able.

The incredible treatment.

Well, you started your story by sharing about your mom going through through cancer.

How can you share with us, how is your

mom doing?

Yeah, she's fine.

She had a lumpectomy and then she didn't need any radiation or chemo.

And you know, honestly, the reason why I went in last January is because in the beginning of December I had two really close friends get diagnosed with breast cancer and then, A week later, my mom was going in for a regular visit and she's like, oh, they found another lump.

They're gonna have to do a biopsy.

And I was like, I can't avoid doing this anymore.

Like I can't pretend that this is scar tissue anymore.

I need to go in.

I had noticed it at Thanksgiving.

So thank the, whatever is bigger than us for putting those steps in my life because I think that you.

, there are no coincidences.

And I feel lucky that, my mom, my, I joke with my mom that she probably saved my life by getting cancer . Cause I, I wouldn't, they, you know, at the time it was like, go get a mammogram on your 50.

And then during my cancer treatment, they changed it to 45.

So.

Mm-hmm.

, I mean, there's no harm.

In getting a mammogram, it's not a, it's not that big a deal, but the re you know, not doing it is a big

deal and not to take away from women and mammograms, but for men, they need to do self-checks or learn how to do a self-check for testicular cancer as well.

It is real.

It is out there.

I have a friend who passed away from it.

I have another friend, her husband.

Did get checked because of what he was our friend was going through and they found testicular cancer in him.

And he, he is a survivor in that.

So for men who are listening, remember that there is testicular cancer, make sure you get checked as well.

Yeah,

absolutely.

And it's, you know, it's one of those things like, I think there's some shame around like, oh God, I don't wanna talk about my boobs, or I don't wanna talk about my testicles, but it.

Those things can kill you if you don't.

If you just wanna avoid, and I, it's, there should be no shame.

There should be like an acknowledgement that this happens way more than I think.

Anyone real going to Huntsman, I was like, oh my God, there's so many people, there's so many people that are going through this right now.

Like made me feel less lonely.

Also was kind of sad.

Because I knew I was gonna be okay and there was a lot of, a lot of really hurt soldiers out there that I know probably didn't make it.

Well, you speaking out today and reaching this audience are helping break down the barriers of talking about boobs and testicles,

. Sarah Cavallaro: I mean, I have so much to say about that, but I'll keep it to myself.

. Stephan Abrams: I I would love to hear it on another

day about it.

You know, when I decided to, I found out I had cancer, like literally a week and a half before I was supposed to go on spring break to Mexico and changed our trip.

So I actually went to Huntsman the day before we flew to Mexico and we got to Mexico and we were with another group of friends and we turned it into, We said we were doing research on the beach of like what my new boobs would look like.

Like I feel like you gotta find the funny and stuff.

And if you don't, it gets heavier.

And I think it's healing to be able to laugh at like, I have fake boobs now.

I never really thought that that would be part of my story, but that's a real thing.

Fake boobs have a purpose.

They have a purpose.

. That's not just

aesthetics.

. That's right, that's right.

And how did your, your kids come out of going through your cancer?

Because it, it's not just you, it's Right.

Your, your kids.

so the first time.

You know, we were all kind of in the wild west rodeo of this cuz it was new.

my dad and stepmom, my family and my sister, like my family rallied and were awesome and you know, like came to stay with the kids when I was in Salt Lake and recovering.

Cause I didn't come home after I had the mastectomy.

It was a lot of, you know, yucky stuff that they didn't need to be more scared.

Mm-hmm.

. So I stayed for about a month to recover from that and.

so we worked through the first time.

The second time, that was really, really hard.

my son was seven, my daughter's 11, so it was like, We actually got them involved in therapy because there was a lot of anxiety happening.

A lot of, you know, they were acting out in their own ways, not in bad, not terrible, but it was, you could tell that there was major stress happening for them.

And so we got them in with each of them had a therapist, and the therapist taught were awesome.

They were our, they were actually our first shield therapist, which I.

Asked to do that because I knew who they were and I knew how amazing therapists they were.

So I was using our own services because I knew that that program, the program worked.

And what type of program did you call it?

It's the Hirschfield Center.

Oh, okay.

Okay.

Yeah.

one of our therapists is an art therapist.

The other one, you know, does emdr.

They're both just phenomenal people and the kids, you know, came to my office a lot.

So the therapy piece of working with 'em felt more comfortable and they, you know, they worked with them weekly for a while and now we're kind of to six weeks to every two months just to check in.

But I really wanted the kids to have a resource because I knew that Andy and I had our plates full and.

I wanted them to feel like they had their person that was outside of Andy and I trying to parent them, but they had someone to go to to talk about hard things and be able to talk to us, talk to someone about how to talk to us about their feelings.

And it really, really, from February until.

Pretty much when school came out, they were regular, you know, regularly going to therapy.

And I think it helped them a ton, make it through a really, really rugged time.

And who knows what comes out when they're adults.

And I probably messed it up somehow, but we tried to give 'em , give them some supports that were outside of our house or family

that's, important.

Parents or people wanna bury it versus getting help.

And I've had several people on the podcast and we've talked about mental health and it's, well, we talk about our physical health.

People talk about that very openly or their diet health.

But when it comes to mental health, it's as though that it, that side of it gets buried.

Or there is the social stigmatism of saying, I go see a therapist.

I've seen a therapist more years of my life than I haven't mm-hmm.

. So I, I believe in our product that we're selling yfs.

So I feel like it's pretty important for me to practice what I preach and not that I have it all figured out at all.

I think older I get, the more I realize how much more help I could use.

But I think it's really important to have whether or not you're continually working with the therapist, just knowing that you have a resource that you can turn to if the world flips upside down someday.

Well, it did a few years ago.

Yeah.

it did Your did well with Covid.

I mean, for, for a lot of people in that side of things, but, yeah.

You know, yeah, I've, I've been there before with therapy and.

Figuring out life with parents and growing up and

yeah, growing ups hard.

It's not like there's, it's not a book, like, here's how you do it.

Mm-hmm.

, Stephan Abrams: no.

There's, there's books, but there's not really, we're people, there's no instruction manual for people.

Yeah, there's thoughts and ideas, but which is the world that you work in, being at, you know, the executive director at Teton Youth and Family Services.

Is there a connection between Teton Youth and Family Services and Red Top is

Teton Youth and Family Services is the umbrella nonprofit for Hershfield Center for Children, the Van Block Group, home and Crisis Shelter, and Red Top Meadows.

So they're all under Teton.

They're

all under there.

And how many kids at one time are you all servicing?

It depends.

We, we serve over 800 kids and family members every year.

So when we work with a kid, say they're in our group home, we also provide therapeutic services from a family.

Mm-hmm.

try to look at it holistically and not, there's the, the kid that's in our program isn't the identified patients, the whole family.

It needs support and so we try to look at it beyond just the kid and so, We serve, different, numbers of kids and families in our programs and the different levels.

So her shield center is really, I call it our prevention program.

so as we go up to red top, we start at her shield.

The her shield center's the cheapest.

It's outpatient.

It serves the most kids and family members.

it's like probably the le the least restrictive I guess.

And then you move into our group home and crisis shelter, and that's a residential placement for kids, but it's in their community.

We send kids home, so we try, it's kind of the next step.

And then Red top is kids a bit are removed from their families for a variety of reasons, but they live and go to school at Red Top.

So we try to service everyone at the hirschfield level.

That's not always something we can do because the needs might be greater, but we have levels of care that are in place so that we're not just jumping to the highest level of care.

And the group home is what?

What's the name of that?

the Van.

Black House.

Van.

Black House.

when you talk about the whole process and how do you get the parents to join in, because it's not just the kid that's the patient, it's the whole family.

Yeah.

Some cases are more successful than others.

I think the most success we have is when the whole family participates.

This is not about identifying one person as being bad or wrong.

This is about helping a family figure out how to function different.

and the families that participate and learn new skills and change old behaviors are the ones that we see, as a success and as.

Change happens.

So it's the ones where we're really struggling for parents to get involved, where the parents don't, you know, necessarily believe that they have a role in it.

that's a, that's harder.

Probably more prevalent.

and our job is to help the kid.

You know, I say that we're a kid-centered organization, meaning the kids' needs come first.

we've had situations where, you know, divorced parents we're working with the kid and they have divorced parents, and the parents want support for what they're doing, and we look to the kid and say, what do you need?

Because a lot of times it's very easy to defer to the adult and not listen to the kids, and our job is to make sure the kids have a voice and figure out how to incorporate the whole family structure in that.

I could certainly see where kids needs get pushed aside.

. Sarah Cavallaro: Yeah.

Well, they have, they have limited rights and they're reliant upon adults to take care of them.

Mm-hmm.

for food, clothing, and safety.

And when they don't necessarily have the resources to be independent, but they do have, you know, I I, someone told me once when I had my daughter, she was, she was my first, someone told me in the hospital, or maybe, I don't know what it was, but it was very early on, they were.

How you can best approach having your cause I was, you know, seeking parent advice.

How you can best approach your daughter is consider her human now and that she has needs and opinions and wants.

And she's trying to tell you that and you need to show her respect even as a one month old.

And so I took.

Very seriously.

And I remember like changing Callie's diaper and being like talking to her about like what was happening and it, instead of like, they were like, A lot of people do things to kids versus do things with kids.

And so I was, I, I really took whatever, I don't even know who told me what that, who, what that was, but it was a really helpful piece in, they have thoughts and feelings that are valid.

I don't care what age they are, they can be an infant, but they, their thoughts and feelings are real and valid for them right now.

And regardless of our judgments of if they're seen or not.

Their thoughts and feelings that they're experiencing.

And we need to say, we need to respect that.

And that's something that I've held as a parent because I believe that our kids, my kids deserve respect, and it's very easy for me to not listen to them.

Don't get me wrong.

Like I am not a perfectionist in the parenting department at all.

Had many, many times where I've looked at someone, I'm like, I'm in this business and I'm having this meltdown.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

, it happens to everyone.

but that's something that I do, kind of a core belief that I developed as having a kid, which I then translate to the kids that we serve, is that they deserve to be respected and treated as having their own thoughts and feelings and given respect to have those

Sarah, we're gonna take a quick break to get a word from one of our sponsors.

Okay.

And we're gonna come back and talk more about Teton Youth and Family Services.

Sounds good.

Sarah, welcome back.

We're just talking about, the role that Teton Youth and Family Services.

You guys have several different programs that you offer here in the community, and you, you even said, Hey, you're in this business and you're not a perfect parent.

Nobody's a perfect person, and your kids still have meltdowns.

I mean, we have them regularly in our household.

certainly had one last night when reading with my youngest.

He says, I'm not a good reader, and he's, he's getting help reading at school and it is helping him so much.

He's coming such a stronger reader, but he'll sta still take this position.

I'm not a strong reader and you are, you are a strong reader.

You're just at your level and you keep practicing and you'll be at a different.

But he still has that meltdown.

Yep.

And, it's there,

it happens to us all.

Yeah, for sure.

I mean, how many times have I melted down because I don't think I'm good in this area, or I feel like I did something wrong in the different area.

I just have figured out how to self-regulate, so I'm not like throwing books and stuff.

. That's, that's the goal is to teach kids how to regulate, how they have emotions, like have the emotions, but.

Let's not be destructive about it.

And

nowadays compared with where we are now and in this community, I mean, people look at Jackson Hole as this beautiful, amazing community.

But there's the real word world stuff that goes on.

I mean, look, VanEck was started, the VanEck house was started when

So VanEck House started.

This is the story behind the Van Black House.

So, the VanEck family, we're known as a family in the community, as a family that will take wayward wanders and meaning, you know, if someone had to go to the hospital and they couldn't make it back home, and their horse and buggy or whatever.

Older form of transportation was happening, the Van Black family would be a resource to be able to go stay with 'em.

They'd feed you, they'd give you a bed to sleep in, and it was kind of an all or welcome feeling.

And so when we started, T Y F S and Van Black House was the first program.

We were a drop-in center for youth where basically kids could go if they were homeless, if they were going through crisis.

so it started as in the same light of where kids that were wayward stragglers could go, I guess

Mm-hmm.

. And from there, you know, we developed into a crisis shelter group home.

And when was Red Top started?

Okay.

Many of them weren't even, didn't have names on them back then, and we were still probably one of the poorest counties.

But the community saw a need.

Yes.

That even for such a small community, there was still a need for kids in crisis, or such as you said is homeless.

So it's always been there.

Yes.

we've changed over the years because the needs have changed and I think Covid has been a really fast change.

We've had to fast track some changes, in terms of the kids that we're serving are different than the kids we were serving years ago, and how do we best serve them with these different needs?

And I.

I give a ton of credit to our staff for being flexible and being able to take a look at that.

and you know, the whole world of Covid has created so many strange problems that I did not anticipate the day Covid happened or shut everything down was March 17th and.

I had a board meeting on March 17th that went virtual and at the board meeting we were supposed to approve this like five year long planning process of starting Capital Campaign to make our facilities, you know, more safe, better.

We have old facilities.

Anyway, the board, the board and I were like, Nope, that's not happening.

I need to now come up with policies and procedures of how to run a residential program, residential program.

When you're in a pandemic.

And that was a crazy journey of, I'm not a public health nurse or have any public health education.

And I was creating things that like, these are our systems, these are our processes.

Nobody like helped us with that.

In fact, the state actually took ours and gave 'em to all the rest of the proposing crisis shelters around the state because we had, actually, they didn't have anything.

And so, I kind of felt a little weird about that cause I was like, don't you maybe want your Department of Health to look at this?

Cause I don't know what I'm doing.

. But I mean it's common sense of like looking at systems and how flows are, which I was like, okay, if you can think of this as a systems thing, COVID is, we can do this.

Mm-hmm.

. And so we implemented all these different systems and were able to keep kids safe.

We never closed.

and we were there 24 7 for kids, which was the goal.

so last fall.

our kids have moved from being, I say they express that, you know, when I was working childcare staff or working in direct service in the programs, kids would throw things, they would break windows, they would, you know, punch walls.

They would express externally when they were frustrated or going through something, what the change has been over the years and very much drastic, like kinda.

Excelled.

This movement was kids have now turned internally, meaning they're self-harming, they're suicidal, they're depressed, they're anxious, but they're, how that gets expressed is very much quiet.

it's secretive.

It's very, you know, you can hide it easier, and I prefer broken windows and broken walls because I, it's me seeing kids get the energy out and getting the feelings out.

When I see kids that are suicidal and self-harming, I'm seeing them turn into themselves and that's harder, that's harder to monitor.

It's harder to keep kids safe.

Because they do things like, like they've, they were breaking, light bulbs in the group home and using 'em to self-harm.

Well, our facilities were not built for that, so it became very obvious that our facilities were not meeting the needs of the level of kids that we were serving.

So we decided we can't wait anymore for this capital piece.

we gotta jump off this cliff and.

You know, we had an incredible.

Say we're gonna take this jump.

And we developed a 15 million camp capital campaign, which remodels the group home and crisis shelter and puts our suicidal holding bed in that facility.

Right now it's, they're separate and it's very hard to staff.

It upgrades a lot of the Hirschfield Center stuff like windows that don't shut, that'll close windows.

And then it rebuilds our residential building out at red top.

Belong with doing some programmatic things, like an employee housing stipend program for three years and a maintenance fund.

Just basically giving us some resources that we've never had before.

Um mm-hmm.

, I talk about when I first started working for T Y F S, I remember there was a couple times where the bookkeeper would be like, so maybe don't cash your check today.

And I was always like, what?

Like, But it, it's always been a, you know, pick up the paperclips and save every dollar we can because we believe in serving kids and.

And I, I think we've shifted that mentality of money-wise, at least from always being in crisis to the board's, done a great job of creating a reserve fund of shoring us up financially so that we're not reacting to every small thing.

We can look at the big picture and look at our big, our facilities and say, wow, if we're gonna keep serving kids with this level of need, we need to change.

And so that's where this campaign came from.

And we put it to the voters, on the spit ballot, which was.

Great.

And, we had tremendous support and I, the way we structured it, it was is it's a 10 million private part of the campaign and a 5 million public part of the campaign.

And why we did that is how T Y F S is made up is it's a public-private partnership and it really, I felt like the campaign represented that as that we're not looking to one.

Funding source for this.

We're looking to the community and the community, meaning donors and community, meaning town and county, and the community meaning the state.

So the two, 2 million spent helped the goal towards the 5 million in public funds.

I go back to Cheyenne.

For I think the fifth time and a month and a half.

I go back, whoa, I just got back two days ago.

but I go back again, Wednesday, next Wednesday, and there's a meeting on Thursday that will hopefully approve a $3 million, application for American Rescue Plan packed funds that can, that will go directly to the, capital construction of the group home and her center.

So, if we can get that public piece in place, I'm hoping that we start the new year with that in place.

we've had incredible generosity from the private sector.

We have about 7 million in commitments of the our 10 million goal.

So my goal would be to end this year in a place that we're feeling really awesome.

We can do this for our facilities, we can do this for kids.

We're gonna be around for a while and we've already started building on Hersh around Van Block and Hershfield, which is so exciting to go and see.

Cause we have video of what it looked like before.

And you go in there and just the framing out of things, I'm like, wow, this is such a huge improvement.

And the goal is to keep it feeling like a home, but also, Provide level of supervision and safety.

Like we have ligature safe stuff in the bathroom.

So the bathrooms are, you know, suicide safe essentially.

Hmm.

Trying not to make it feel like you're going to a hospital where, so we have like dining area, but everything's designed to be very open.

The way our facility was before is there's lots of places to hide and.

With this changing need.

Hiding is really not good.

You can die when you hide.

Mm-hmm.

in the area.

So, it's fun.

I go over there every week or so and go tour around and they have plumbing in there now and it's just really exciting to see the opportunity and the, The resource that's getting created for our community, because I think that a lot of human services in our community, I think go under seen or under noticed and are very quiet.

You know, we quietly provide these incredible services, but I feel like this campaign has been an opportunity to talk about it and invite people.

that might not necessarily be able to or be using our services.

Typically, people don't know us unless they're using our services, and I feel like it's important for the community to know that they've, the community has created this resource, not T Y F S.

And I say that we, we wouldn't be here if our community didn't value it.

We have had enough things happen that, the community has showed up for us and made sure that the financial.

Pieces are there so that we can deliver the services.

That's beautiful.

how does your funding come through?

Is it federal, state, and local, or is it Yes.

The state and local.

It's all federal, state, local philanthropy, and so, On all of that has changed dramatically over the last 10 years.

Mm-hmm.

, we used receive around 75, 80% funding from state contracts or services.

Cause the state doesn't have facilities like ours.

They contract with nonprofits like us to provide.

That's where the public-private partnership comes in.

So they moved from funding us at 75, 80% to their, down to 28 to 30%.

And so that gap that was created has had to be filled locally, and that has been through the town and county, local governments really stepping up and through private philanthropy really stepping up.

So that's why I say, you know, and the impact.

The state funding cuts in other communities is way different for them than it is, you know, like we are lucky to live in Jackson and have this resource of a really affluent community that understands the value of the services.

That's not the case around the state, and what I'm seeing with our partners is just.

Really the, the shift is going from the state is really saying this local people, if you want these resources, you're gonna have to figure it out.

Which has been something that we definitely have been, I've been working with our association on helping to change, cuz I believe we have a role, not just them pointing their fingers at each other.

It's, we all are responsible to take care of kids and families, not just one group.

And, and so what's the struggle with organizations like yours and the rest of the state where there's not the affluence that Jackson has?

They don't.

a lot of them don't have the town and county local government support because they don't have the tax base that we have.

Mm-hmm.

and they also don't have the, the philanthropy that we have.

and I, you know, I talk when I'm at, I was just at an association meeting earlier this week and I talk about we're kind of.

The outlier in what's really happening.

what's really hap well, and that's, that's not totally true either.

Like, services are getting cut and their availability is dwindling.

And what's happening is that the state's seeing some really, really high level kids that there are no services for.

because we've let the system dwindle.

So now we've created these, all these high level kids that we've identified cost about a million bucks a year to serve, don't have the services, and there's gonna be more if we don't start trying to keep kids in group homes, keep kids in residential treatment, keep them in child advocacy centers, because what is ending up happening is kids

So if,

if we took preventative measures in action earlier, Yes.

not looking at it from a, I mean, it is finances.

I mean, it comes down to that.

It is, it's still the human, the the, the human integrity completely.

If we make the right investment now versus waiting to see, you know, that it's extreme and irre irreparable.

Well, and I think it goes back to you can't just serve the highest level need.

Like then you're just gonna create a whole lot of high level need.

Mm-hmm.

. So prevention.

Like prevention.

I feel like TFS and all of our programs are prevention, even though we have residential treatment.

What I, 85% of the kids we serve in our residential programs don't go into higher levels of care, meaning they're not going to detention, they're not going to psychiatric residential treatment.

We're keeping them from, we're preventing them from going to these levels of care that are extremely costly and extremely.

Invasive to the family and like as part of my spec application, I had to do an avoided cost study and I estimated very, very conservatively.

I think this number could probably be doubled, but very conservatively.

We're saving about 4.3 million a year in avoided costs by providing the services through T Y Fs.

Well thank you to you and the board.

And all the staff who put forth that hard work every day.

Yeah.

No, I'm, I am the lucky one.

I get to have the stream job of working with people that, you know, I, I stopped doing direct care because I was realizing I was starting to lose faith in humanity.

And these people keep faith in humanity and are able to work in probably some of the toughest things you've ever seen.

and maintain a sense of humor and a life and a balance.

And that's a real gift.

Yes, it is , because life definitely happens.

It does.

Mm-hmm.

and dunno what it's gonna be.

Sometimes it's super fun and exciting.

Sometimes it's the opposite.

. Stephan Abrams: That's right.

Yeah.

That's so true.

So Sarah, I so appreciate your courage and you sharing.

The, the road that you've been through and, and what you do for our community.

If people wanted to reach out and connect with you, what is a great way for them to do that?

They can email me, or they're, feel free to give me a call too.

my, I pretty much just run on a cell phone, so my, and I don't really care.

I mean, as long as you're not calling me to sell me something.

what is your email?

Let's start

there.

S Cavalero, c a v as in Victor, a l l a r o@tyfs.org.

So that was s cavalero t y fs.org.

Yep.

Okay.

Thank you Sarah.

Well, I know that you have some important work to go finish up to get your day going, and I so appreciate you taking the time to share Yeah.

Your journey, your

email, and reach out.

I appreciate that.

That's, I feel honored,

, Stephan Abrams: you're You're very welcome.

Well, I feel honored.

We got to speak today.

Yeah, and you share your story.

Well, thank you.

Have a good, great day, Sarah.

Enjoy weekend and enjoy this freshly falling snow with the family.

Thanks.

Warming up, . Yeah.

All right.

Take care Sarah.

Good to see you today.

Okay.

Bye-Bye.

To learn more about Sarah Cavalero and Teton Youth and Family Services, visit the Jackson hole connection.com, episode number 221.

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Love to you sweetie, and my boys, Lewis and William, you bring joy to us every day.

And to me, thank you Michael for editing all these podcasts.

Folks, if you wanna start your own podcast, get in touch with Michael Moeri.

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His contact information is in the show notes.

I appreciate you sharing your time with me today.

Cheers till next week.